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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Feb 25, 2024
In Writing
I start off my day with a dose of laughter because the rest of the day goes by with me struggling every second not to cry.
It’s difficult but when you’re half way through work and feel like looking at your wrist watch to confirm what the time is only to find out it’s not even 10am yet, you realise you’ve spent the best part of your morning worrying about things you can’t fix.
Who knew the age we anticipated turning so bad when we were 17 was going to come with so many baggage’s?
One day you’re 21 and the next day you’re turning 27 but in between these years, you never looked back for once to see if the dreams you wished and prayed you were living right now actually came through. All you worry about is the next 5years forgetting the last 5years is where you had your best memories.
I’m only coming to the greatest realisation of my existence; that I prayed for this life many years ago and I asked for this age but now that it is here,I’ve done nothing but be anxious for even daring to turn this age at all.
I will live in the constant fear of myself failing to do the things I hope to do but before then, say the grace today and everyday.
I give thanks not for a life well lived but for a life lived at all because in life all that is worth celebrating is something that has been achieved and all I have achieved is staying alive.
Now at nearly 30, I’m left picking up the tiny pieces of the leftover laughs I had when I was only 15 and something in me knows that I will never have that again in my life.
Adulthood has been teaching me a lot lately. That if you don’t make a constant effort to take care of yourself, your body will pick a day for you and you surely will not like the outcome.
That if you don’t make a visible effort to keep up with your friends, you’ll wake up one day to an empty contact list.
That if you don’t cherish your family each and every day, you’ll wake up one day and struggle to catch up with them.
We can’t always pick the life we want for ourselves but we can enhance it daily.
It’s never easy but who ever said it was going to be? All you have to do is wake up and show up and if this is the only message you see today, God is definitely speaking to you.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Oct 08, 2023
In Writing
Let's talk about comfort! Comfort is essential to a happy life. Feeling comfortable in your environment, with people around you, and with yourself can help you to feel relaxed and at ease. Comfort is an important part of feeling content and fulfilled but should we remain in our comfort zones even when it becomes uncomfortable?
I'm always so scared to try new things or visit new places or even eat a different meal because I've found comfort in the things I know. I've gotten so used to them that when I go out of my way to try new things, it gives me terrible anxiety or let's just say I tend to overthink it. And hello, I'm not the only one. A lot of us here are like that. We become so used to our routines and habits that it's hard to break out of them. It's important to challenge ourselves and be willing to try new things in order to expand and diversify our perspectives.
Most of the time we find things very familiar and just stick to them because oh well it's what we know. This could be a human being or food or a place or a job. So we just remain there and go to God in prayer.
Darling I'm here to tell you today that you're not being fair to yourself or the people waiting to meet you or the events waiting to be explored. Go to that place, try that food, try on that dress, apply for that job. What's the worst that could happen? You get turned down and so what? Do you die? Take risks, go for it. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain. Don't worry what other people think, this is your life and it's up to you to make the most of it.
Embrace your uniqueness and don't be afraid to live life. It's honestly too short to play it safe. Embrace the unknown and don't be frightened to make mistakes. Life is an adventure and it's up to you to make it count.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Sep 20, 2023
In Writing
What will I tell my younger self?
Embrace the heartache and let it strengthen you. I love romance movies so much because they make me imagine if loving someone in real life was actually that possible.
In a lifetime of watching romantic movies and reading romantic books, I can't begin to count the number of times I've thought this would be what I wanted, or how many times I've said to myself, I'd like that.
Throughout my life, I have been loved and I have had the chance to give love to others and I think if you asked me at the age of 42 if I would do it all over again, my answer would be yes. I want you to hear what I have to say!
A lot of people have fled from love and some are still running until this very moment and it can be totally understandable. Imagine giving your entire being to one human being. There is nothing worse than loving someone so much that your whole body feels the pain and absence of that person when they are absent. Imagine loving someone so desperately and tenderly that it feels like you’re loving yourself only to be left miserable like a hopeless child asking for candy.
I was only 19 years old when I felt such heartache and even until now, it is a pain I like to describe as the builder of character. I can’t exactly say I regret it but I can say it completely reshaped me. Some people would say falling in love at such a tender age was risky but I don’t think love knows age, class or gender. Love has no favourites or enemies. It just gives out.
This guy was the perfect definition of perfection in God's eyes.
All the Bible verses and quotes and humanitarian references blindsided me to believing he was what I needed. Never been in love but I sure was willing to fall for this man right here. He definitely had me at hello and I’d be damned if my butterflies didn’t grow wings that second. I felt a connection that I had never known before. I was drawn to him in a way that was unexplainable but I knew it had to be something special. I was so excited for the future and the potential that we had together.
I was willing to give up everything for this feeling, and I was ready to give him my all. I knew that with the right person, I could finally find the happiness that I had always wanted. I was willing to take that leap of faith and take a chance on love. Nevertheless, not all love stories have a happy ending like the movies portray.
My ending was bitter and suicidal but I'm willing to fall in love a thousand more times. I'm willing to exhaust all of the beautiful red hearts and all of the I loves you because I have so much more to give and also because i don't believe in hard girl no dey love.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Aug 18, 2023
In Writing
Should the way I express my feelings to my friends be a factor in determining my background? I would say not really.
Sometimes you meet certain people and at first you doubt the potentials of your friendship but then they go on to become the peas you can’t let go of.
I’ve learned that feelings are expressed in exchange of gifts and pleasantries and hugs and sweet compliments you know. But I’ve also learned that feelings can be expressed in the awkward most irritating way and until this day I can’t tell if it’s a good thing or a bad thing.
I find it disturbing when my friends send me messages that contain high emotional stuff.
When my friend types ‘guyyy’ this is more like what I’d recognise coming from her compared to when I see ‘Comfort how are you doing today?’
Trust me,we have questioned our behaviour severally but it’s funny how we all understand it this way.
Would I respond to romantic texts from my friends? Of course but I’d go on to ask ‘are you dying?’
This is weird everyone would say but this is the way we have settled to expressing emotions for one another. One would say it has everything to do with how we were shown love growing up but I strongly doubt it. I just think we found what worked for us and maintained it.
It’s only disadvantage would be trying to make friends and eventually making friends with people who find high emotional actions as their own way of keeping up.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Aug 09, 2023
In Writing
I was in Junior high when I knew
people could feel different types of
emotions. Happy,sad,anger,disgust,envy,a deep feeling of missing someone. Imagine how shocking that was to me.
Visiting days where only twice every term but
Sundays were a waver so anyone could visit students. I knew I was expecting two people that very Sunday. All week long I anticipated seeing them but I started to get this feeling in me as though there was a hole in my chest-something wasn’t right.
After lunch on Sunday I heard someone call my name in the hostel saying I had visitors. Of course I was excited so I got dressed and started running out of the hostel.
A throbbing headache and sharp pain cursing through my face followed by dizziness all within 45seconds. It took 45seconds to get the scar that changed my whole school term.
She said it was a mistake but until this very day I can’t bring myself to believe why she stretched out her leg in a place she knew students go by every now and then.
If the term ‘fell head over heels for you’ was a person,I’d be that person. I fell so hard on my face and got an injury that looked like it could never be healed.
The feeling of being worried about and looked after. Oh the man I MISS.
Getting to know what I was feeling all that week was an emotion called Miss.
the ability to feel one’s absence when they’re away from you,the unconsciousness to getting life scaring face injury for a person whom you knew was only a facade.
All I know is,that one experience opened my heart to this new world of self awareness and realising that humans actually have the capacity to feel so much.
Even though I don’t go through that path often, I know there’s an emotion that lets you feel like a chunk of your heart has been ripped out of your body or that there’s an opening in your soul that can’t be closed until you’re wrapped in the presence of that one person.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 20, 2023
In Writing
You know it's insecurity when the reason it started is because someone dear to you made you feel horrible about yourself. This kind of insecurity can be difficult to shake off, and it can become a barrier between you and the rest of the world. It can also lead to low self-esteem and worthlessness. It's imperative to identify these feelings and work on them to create a more positive outlook. And today, I can beat my chest and say that I did my best, but how far can my attempts take me? Ever heard of the lisp tongue? Most people believe that LISP is a speech condition where "s" and “z” are substituted in their speech, resulting in distorted conversation. However, while this is true to a certain extent, LISPing impediments are much more complicated than most people think. LISPing involves a complex mix of articulation errors, phonological errors, and prosodic errors. It can affect sentence creation and lead to poor speech comprehension. LISPing is a common speech disorder that leads to communication difficulties. I remember being a confident child. I even carried this with me into adulthood, but along the way, I was bullied, called names, and accused of being rude and angry. This was because my communication level was different and I had a speech defect. I get questions like, "Why do you talk the way you do?" I can’t count how many times I've been offered free classes to correct my defect. I can't count how many times I’ve been stopped in the middle of a conversation to be asked stupid questions. If I could, I would create myself again, but do I have such power? Certainly not. At some point, my voice was too loud. ‘You have a male voice,' they would point out to me. Boarding school was much worse. The girls in the hostel would say they thought a man had walked into the room. Sometimes I even played a man in school drama because people said, ‘I have the voice for it'. After a while, I built on that. I accepted my voice for what it was. I started to appreciate my voice for its uniqueness. I began to use it to my advantage in different situations. I realized that my voice was not a limitation but rather a strength I could use to express myself. I gained the confidence I needed along with it. However, when I progressed further in life, people beat me up for having such a deep voice, as if I created it myself. I started to doubt myself and my voice again, but I did not let them define me. I kept striving despite criticism and embraced my voice again. I’ve learned to take things as they come; I’ve learned to accept my life as it is; and I've also learned that people address you through how you look at yourself. Now, I still have a fear of speaking in rowdy places. This is for two reasons: lack of confidence and the fact that people would mock my voice and ask questions about my speech impediment. I've been trying to overcome this fear slowly but surely. I'm becoming more confident in public, and I'm learning how to handle mocking and disrespectful comments. I'm determined to become a better public speaker and take control of my own narrative. Regardless, I carry myself in the most professional manner, and when someone accuses me of being rude, I just tell them that’s your business because I didn’t intend what I said to be rude, but for the most part, it is you who interprets it that way. I strive to be as polite and respectful as possible, and I take full responsibility for my words. Ultimately, I control how I present myself and interact with others. But I will never be sorry for how I was created. I am not a perfectionist, and I make mistakes, but I am confident in who I am, and I refuse to apologize for that. I will not be silenced or ashamed of speaking my mind. I will always strive to be the happiest version of myself and kind to those around me. I will not let anyone else dictate how I should think or act, and I will always stand up for what I believe in. I am proud of who I am, and I will never apologize for it.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 15, 2023
In Writing
I used to think I was dull; in fact, I convinced myself I was dull, and I still am. You know how you can tell you’re messing up when something doesn't go right? I can't say I had a rough life. However, I can boldly say I just didn’t take things seriously, or I thought I knew enough to carry me through at the time. My instincts kept telling me I would pass the rest of the classes just like the JSS3 exams. Ss1 was the flexible level, and I danced and lived life until the results came out. I was so tensed (I still carry the tension from that day) I managed to open my result, but all I could see was ‘you have repeated Ss1'. Lmao With the kind of parents I have, I knew my life would just end, and for the first time ever, I considered suicide, but I didn't go through with it. A friend of mine followed me to the school toilet, where I cried my eyes out. I headed back to the hostel to think about my life. I refused to go home, even though I was sure my parents would worry that I wasn’t home yet. At night, I’d wake up and pray to God that the result was fake, that I was dreaming, or something, but nothing changed. Daybreak I decided to go home, and I promise you, you don’t want to know how it ended. The break was over, and I had to go back to school and face the juniors I was wicked to. I knew life was about to become a shithole for me, but I was ready to face it all. Classes began about a week after the resumption, and I hated it. My permanent seat was near the exit door, and I never paid attention to the teacher. I knew I wanted to do better at school, but I couldn't focus. During break time, I would sit and cry. Sometimes my friends, who were now a class ahead of me, came to see me. However, as time passed, they stopped coming, which I completely understood was due to their busy schedule, so I didn't hold it against anyone. I eventually decided to channel all my emotions into something reasonable. I took out one of my school notebooks and started jotting down my feelings. With time, those feelings became actual words I could read. My literature teacher back then was so nice. He noticed I was always composing poems, so one day he called me into his office and told me to always bring them to him. I’d take them to him, and he’d make corrections and hand them back to me. It was comforting to know someone paid attention to me. I wrote so much that at the end of the term, that notebook was filled up, and I didn’t even notice it. Somehow, I misplaced that book, but I passed my first term as a second-timer in that class. I was so proud of myself. I stopped writing after losing that notebook, but some of those words stuck with me for years. Fast forward to years after school, when I decided to start composing again, and surprisingly, I was still as proficient or even better. I developed so much passion for writing that if I ever felt the tiniest bit uncomfortable in a situation, I’d turn to writing. Whenever I feel something, I write it down. I help people express themselves with words they don’t think they have to. I walk in people's shoes and understand their emotions. That’s how I sometimes write, and I know I’m not where I want to be yet, but I am headed in that direction. My teacher worked so hard to ensure I had the right words to say. I am eternally thankful to him for teaching me that if I wanted to stand out from the rest of the writers, it was imperative to follow my own pattern rather than follow ABAB or whatever standard exists. Today, he is gone. He can’t see me achieve the greatness I prayed for and worked for, but I know he is proud. Most of my family members don’t even know I write or love it. However, I hope they understand me as much as I understand myself. Something seagull-like led to this wonderful brain of mine today. Even though some days I still doubt my intelligence, one day I'll accept it.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Dec 07, 2022
In Writing
To be kind means one’s ability to be weak Or so they said but who made the rules? To be kind means to suffer in the debts of one’s soft spot for a loved one who does nothing but take advantage of this emotion To be kind means to give room for emotional blackmail and turmoil To be kind means to give key access to your abuser Perhaps to be kind means to live in despair but To be kind is smiling to that Aboki who insulted you for no reason or Shaking hands with that wicked employer With no form of grudge or vengeance in your heart It would also mean playing with the rude woman’s kids down the street because they did nothing to you In real sense,being kind will most likely not pay but you will live with a sense of satisfaction
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Dec 02, 2022
In Writing
Toss to the left,toss to the right! It’s day time and you’re wondering what other reality you have to face today Thoughts of the previous night hits you! You get flashbacks from the conversation Concerning so many things Things you didn’t think you’d ever open up about Now you have to look into the mirror and accept the ugly reflection of the fat person staring at you You thought you had everything right and at your feet Life has come crashing once again and this time, you have no idea how to fix it You repeat the same words over and over like you’re trying to convince yourself about the impossible. I WILL BE FINE but this is the same thing you said after the first,the second,the third and now the forth. Maybe they’ll keep leaving for you to realise you’re better off alone
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Nov 30, 2022
In Writing
That night on my bathroom floor I could tell there was someone there And maybe the heavens were opened that day because my prayers were answered It could be that he called you pretty even when you felt ugly It could be that he called you sexy even when you felt the least sexy It could be that he wiped your tears even when he was the reason behind them It could be that his friends knew you but they knew several others too That night on my bathroom floor I think the angels heard me because Tell me how I’m resting in the arms of a well nurtured man How I’m walking side by side with earth’s Imperfection How I’m thinking less and fighting less of myself That night on my bathroom floor, the heavens definitely heard me.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Sep 23, 2022
In Writing
Momma shouted from the streets, be careful Chima but momma had been shouting all her life and I swear I just wanted to do it for her. I saw the pain and tiredness she carried around daily but all I could do was assist her in selling her small beverages. Uncle ikenna visited last Christmas and promised to take me with him the next time he was around so I looked forward to December.
Sister chioma hardly visited or called anyone so momma was hoping she’d visit this year alas she did but she wasn’t the same; she looked tired and weary and it was only a matter of days before she passed on. Her death left everyone with shock because she had only been gone for two years. Momma was scared to let me go but it was my turn to fend for the family so I packed up my things and followed uncle Ikenna back to the city It was few minutes past 9 when we arrived uncle Ikenna’s house. It was massive, bigger than my expectations; a lot of questions had started creeping in but I held on to them until the following morning when I’d see everyone. I was looking forward to seeing Aunty Ifeoma(uncle Ikenna’s wife)and my little cousins but I was told they travelled. I didn’t totally Understand why Aunty Ifeoma would travel without her husband but it wasn’t my business. Uncle Ikenna had gone to work before I woke up the following morning so he just left me a note of where to find what I needed. With so much fear and care,I carried on with the house chores at least the ones I knew how to do. By the time I was done,evening was approaching already and I knew uncle Ikenna would be back from work soon so I decided to make him something small out of the little experience I had gotten from momma. I prepared white rice and stew with dried fish hoping uncle Ikenna would like it when he returned from work and maybe he did like it or not,I wouldn’t know because all he said was thank you for the food but next time,don’t bother.
I got bored from always staying at home alone everyday doing absolutely nothing. I began wondering when aunty and the children would come back from their trip. I sorted out to taking walks every evening in the neighborhood since I had not started work or school yet and uncle Ikenna wasn’t saying anything about it. I hoped to make new friends but uncle Ikenna wasn’t happy about me even leaving the house; he said people were envious of him so they said nasty stuff about him and it’ll be unfair for me to mingle with them.
I have always been a curious boy so I sneaked out during his work hours and on this blessed day,I met a young man on the road who knew almost everything about uncle ikenna(but I thought uncle didn’t talk to anyone in this area?) I wasn’t supposed to be mingling but what else was I supposed to do being left alone everyday.
This man was really nice and friendly,always offering me one thing or another to eat but the Nigerian in me is always suspicious to why someone would always offer me food.
Everyday I’d stroll out of the gate and we’d talk about random things happening in the neighborhood; knowing everything about uncle ikenna was what spiced my friendship with him. I was curious to know so much about my uncle. This my new friend began by describing a very beautiful lady that used to stay in uncles house few months before I arrived. He talked about how hardworking she was and how her beauty was what the talk of every house in the area. Felix also said the last time he saw her was when she took seriously ill. They all stopped seeing her around until now. I knew Felix was describing my sister so i muttered in a low tone,she passed away 2months ago. She was my elder sister. Sister Chioma didn’t look the same as the time she left us when she returned home the last time. We tried our best but nothing could save her.
Next day, I didn’t have the energy to leave the bed or even have a conversion with Felix after remembering how much sister Chioma sacrificed for the family only to give up half way without enjoying it.
There was always this one door locked every time I was trying to clean the house. It never bothered me much anyways until this faithful day. I just had my hopes up that I was going to find lots of money hidden behind doors(too much Nollywood) Something kept saying not to open the doors and for some reason, I thought of following my thoughts but for once, I wanted to find treasure. The locks were tight and I only had my thoughts pacing back and forth to what was inside. At this point,curiosity had the best of me and since uncle wasn’t back yet, I could quickly search for something in the garage to assist me. I got the iron rods and small hammer. It only took 7mins to carefully spoil the locks. At this point, I only wished I had allowed my instincts guide me on not opening that door.
And average aged looking lady was tied up with red cloths and her mouth had a white one. I moved closer to try and recognize this person. Aunty Ifeoma! My heart was racing and in my head,my feets were pacing but in reality, I was fixated to a spot. I knew I had to leave there before uncle got back but I couldn’t leave aunty here. She wasn’t even awake; even if she was, I don’t quite think she would recall who I was
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Feb 16, 2022
In Writing
I begged you with my eyes, I begged you with my fingers brushing through your black jeans I begged you with my laughter but you still couldn’t tell I wanted you to kiss me,to say the three letter words; I needed you to understand that my body was calling out to you; I’m not so difficult to understand. I don’t want you sexually at least not yet; but I want to communicate with you in ways no one ever has, I want to speak the language of love to you. I can’t decipher if i was infatuating or I actually do love you,it’s been over a year I had anything close to this for someone Remember that time you smiled at me, something moved in my chest but I think it’s sitting in its right position now That green shirt you wear all the time looks perfect on you:I know it’ll look better on me but you smell like heaven putting it on My head can’t process your body on mine; you feel like a soft pillow but the type that was made out of the clouds! I think everyone in the room could tell I like you except you or maybe you could Your smile is like a puzzle to my emotions; every time you smile,we try to put them together) but that’s the fun of discovering you. I know you like me just as much as I like you so just say the words already.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 27, 2021
In Writing
I knew I’d regret it the following day but for that moment,it made me happy I knew I shouldn’t have done it but I was too excited at the moment I guess that was all that mattered at the time. It was all fun and laughs until it got serious Situations turned so fast and my heart skipped too fast for me but oh well..... Tears splattered upon my pillows and my bead sheets Deep within me,I knew it was the end but I pushed regardless.......stronger and harder, tougher and better Nothing mattered because all I wanted was in what I had messed up and there was obviously no way to fix it so I just carried on like a lazy caterpillar
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 15, 2021
In Writing
Every combination screaming for your attention without uttering a damn thing but how many pressure do you really resist? The weight of the world isn’t on your shoulder yet you walk like a tired Godzilla Following you has led to nothing good in the past so of what use would it be for the future? Your style is irresistible but do you really represent? What would you say your identity was when you stand before your master? You say the grace with a dirty heart like you’re really a believer Don’t lie to the masses about what you really are because the truth would be known maybe not now but soon
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 08, 2021
In Writing
You asked me to wear my best dress: the one you sent during my birthday. Truth is,I was too excited about meeting you that I didn’t think of any possible harm You said all those nice things to me and no one had called me beautiful in a while. Everytime I looked into the mirror,I only saw the beauty you saw in me because I needed your validation to set myself going daily. It was a beautiful Wednesday morning and the sun was out already. I quickly did my chores and told my mother I was going to Bola’s house and even though she suspected I was lying,she had no reason to hold me back after all,chores were done and the plates were properly washed I had my bath and set off straight to the house with a brown zinc and maybe it’s because of love but I don’t see how I liked such a place but I was happy. The Fanta was so chilled and the buns was soft and sweet; I ate like a child Maybe it was the way you looked at me but something in me didn’t sit right but you assured me you wouldn’t harm me so I relaxed. By the time I realized what was happening,I was too dizzy to move my legs but I fought; though it was aimless because you were stronger and firm.I Pushed but every push brought you even closer then I begged. You were hurting me but my pain seemed like your joy and with every drop of red wine from under my legs, you pushed even deeper. My thighs went sore but you didn’t care either until you had succeeded. I only realize now that maybe I gave consent to you or maybe you were really a beast.
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 03, 2021
In Writing
I was a girl,I didn’t know much but I knew few I knew I had to take care of myself no matter what I knew I had to do it for me and become a better me but I didn’t know how I looked in the wrong places...I think; and somehow that has brought me to where I am today I’m not proud but as a child,I was eager and so I wanted to try everything. Everything led me to nothing and nothing has left me with regrets but regrets will also lead to nothing so I’ll keep working and trying Forgive me on the days I’m at my worst and judge me not on the days I’m a sinner for we’re all sinners on different days but we’re different people on other days too so we’ll just live one day at a time until the clock stops ticking
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
May 03, 2021
In Writing
I am a nobody From something I came,to something I shall return When I speak no one listens because my voice holds no form of power I carry my burdens like a tired traveler for my happy days are ahead When I drop my feet on the ground,no one notices because I am a nobody From something I came,to something I shall return My presence holds no value and my absence isn’t noticed because I never existed I let my eyes do all the work in holding the tears but even if I let them down,they’ll be invisible because I am a nobody From something I came,to something I shall return When I finally leave,only me would know If I really lived or just existed
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Comfort Myam
Author of the Month
Feb 14, 2021
In Writing
We all want someone who’d be true to us and open minded Open enough to tell us when we hurt them and when they want something Open enough to discuss issues rather than wander away when matters get heated then come back when they feel they’re alright thereby disregarding our feelings We all deserve someone who considers our feelings when thinking about things because our feelings are their priority But these things are a luxury these days and only the rich at heart,mind and soul can afford it so my question is, can you be that person for your partner?
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Comfort Myam
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