As jolly as I may seem, Deceptive, maybe! For once I yearned for you, Where are the good times we had? The “I love yous” we used to repeat, Does it seem wrong to you now? I wondered how you made things up, To the one you said you loved the most, Was it just a play? Or was it just your personality? Alas! I lost you for now and for all, Yet I feel good, I giggled at this thought, Why, you ask? Childishly I planned for our future, Endlessly I only thought of you, Eagerly I waited for you every day and night, But now I loathe Myself. They say I'm a fucking bitch, Unless they know the story of us, Are you afraid, my dear? To let the truth be told. I watched and waited for you to come clean, Yet I caught you being amorous, I know you liked it, For you seemed amused, Unabashed and unapologetic. I lost myself in this process of so-called-love, Still exploring and engaging myself, Where it might take me, What more can it show. I wrote “I love me”, And it felt right somehow. It wasn't my fault, I'm right in my stand.